FIFA Rage: Your Hidden Opponent and How to Beat It!

“One of the best lessons you can learn in life is to master how to remain calm”

Bruce Lee

“However great the fury of the storm, the sea does not abandon its calm” 

Mahatma Gandhi

“Your mum buys you FIFA points *controller smash*”  

Darren from Brentford

Do you spot the odd one out too? We’re all guilty of losing our heads on FIFA from time to time, and we all have our own ways of dealing with the anger. But, there’s no need to be in a foul mood for days at a time because of a game! So sit back, relax and enjoy this metaphorical head massage as Stakester takes you through some tips for how to fight FIFA rage this weekend.

Types of FIFA Rage

FIFA anger presents itself in a whole manner of ways and we’re well aware that the cure for FIFA rage isn’t a one size fits all solution. So we’ve tailor-made a remedy for every type of prickly player there is:

The Controller Smasher

All of the greats have their sworn enemies: Batman has the Joker, Messi has Ronaldo and the controller smasher has conceded in the 94th minute. The mainstream media said Gamestop’s stock rose thanks to a short squeeze orchestrated by a group of Redditors – wrong. We prefer to believe that the controller smashers kept Gamestop in business thanks to the sheer volume of controllers they require. This type of player regrets their reactions immediately; not only have they lost a controller, but their bank balance is also going to take a hit!

Stakester’s Solution: Pillows. Lots and lots of pillows. Build yourself a soft play area before starting your long slog of games and then you’ll be able to thrash until your angry heart’s content. But all jokes aside, setting up in a comfortable position before your games begin might be a good way of keeping those stress levels low. And if you concede that late goal and lose a match? Then you’ll be able to lay back in comfort knowing that it was just one game of FIFA and there are more important things to worry about. 

The Silent Pretender

No matter what happens in a game, this player tells themself that it’s not a big deal and that they don’t really care. Whether it’s a terrible pack opening or a last minute loss, this player comes across as cool, calm and collected. But in reality, a cold hatred burns deep within them. All of this pent up anger and rage negatively affects their skill as they plow on, game after game, getting angrier and angrier as their performance drops. 

Stakester’s solution: Let it all out! Shout out of your window at the world, from your rooftop into the void, put the controller down and give yourself a break! If you are a silent pretender then we’re here to tell you that no, it isn’t all okay, so stop telling yourself otherwise. Turn FIFA off for a while, we promise it’ll be there when you get back. Not only that, but after a short break you’ll be much better equipped to take on a new set of opponents and show them what a true coolheaded champion plays like. 

The Protester

We’ve all occasionally been done over by FIFA, our goalkeeper will make a howler out of nowhere or our defender might appear to develop free will and ignore our commands to tackle, but we usually let these things go. Not the Protester. They’ll scream and shout about how the game is fixed and how EA has implemented a scripting mechanic. The protester is big into EA conspiracy theories and would definitely be interested in the latest EA scandal.

Stakester’s solution: Cast off your chains! Let go of the weight of the conspiracies. This is a video game and we should all accept that there are going to be some buggy moments here and there. Can you imagine a world in which a boring 0-0 was a regular occurrence in FIFA? We’d much rather have the thrill of nicking a goal from an impossible shot any day of the week!

The Salty Messenger 

Throughout the course of human history, humankind has expressed itself in a plethora of ways. From ancient paintings in the Lascaux Caves to beautiful verse in the opera houses of Vienna and Sydney, we as a people have been excellent at conveying our emotions and experiences. This player is no different. With their sharp tongue and quick wit they’ll craft messages for their triumphant opponents such as “virgin” and “I bet ur on the dole”; a true wordsmith. But their actions only put down others and make themselves even more I rate.

Stakester’s solution: Bite your tongue! Your words of fury are only going to make you even more tilted and cause you to lose more games. On top of that, we’re all here to have a good time, so just let it go, you’ll be better off for it! 

BONUS

Make your hard work and effort feel worthwhile by playing for money and prizes on the Stakester app. The rage of previous games all feels worth it when you are finally rewarded for all the hard graft that you have put into FIFA 21 this year. And if you fancy mixing it up a little, then we have plenty more games for you to compete on, including Warzone and Rocket League.

Now You Know how to Fight FIFA Rage!

We wanted to show you that playing FIFA all weekend can sometimes be a little draining mentally. It’s tough trying to play up to 30 games a weekend whilst also having some time to relax after a long week of work or study. So, if you take anything from this piece it should be: 

1. Never play when you’re raging.
2. Take frequent breaks.
3. Enjoy the experience!

And if you’re still feeling a little agitated after you’ve finished playing, then don’t be afraid to have a nice bubble bath and a catch up with Lineker and the boys on Match of the Day.

Back yourself and download the Stakester app. Challenge anyone and play amazing games to win money and prizes. Be the master of your own destiny, bang in the goals and get that W.